STUDIO WEAK

final production week is upon us again.
lately, i'm more and more of a mind that this shouldn't be about anxiety attacks, ludicrous deadlines, and trying to finish the sysphean tasks they toss half-heartedly in your path. no. to me it needs to be about this: have i added to my pertinent skills, my creative life? do i have the ability and the impetus to create something that, if i slapped it on your desk, you would fall over yourself to give me the shot and the spot we both know i earned years ago? if not, we just took time away from actualizing the work that will win me my place in the sun. educate, motivate, or eliminate.
three fourths of the way through this school now and most days i feel my worthy abilities and content are painfully minimal... but i also believe i got enough heart to make you cry blood. does that get anyone anywhere in our market?
or is the code, the kern, and the inside connection the only way out of this corner?

untutored courage is useless in the face of educated bullets - Patton.

i'll get there if i gotta gargle glass to do it. i'll sleep when you're dead.
that career, that life? you were just breakin it in for me.